Relationship Sunday

“Relationship Sunday”
by Pastor Kent and Alli Munsey
February 14, 2021

“And of the children of Issachar, which were men that had understanding of the times, to know what Israel ought to do.”

• 1 Chronicles 12:32 (KJV)

We are in extraordinary times and we have faced so much politically, socially, as well as in our relationships as we are in isolation from our loved ones. How we engage in our relationships changes in every season. Let’s consider what our relationships need from us, in this time and in this season. God is always wanting to strengthen and grow our capacity for love and relationships. 

1. Care for and invest in the most important relationships in our lives.

The most important things that we need in our lives are Jesus and the Holy Spirit. When we learn how to love Jesus and put him first, then we can love others well. The Holy Spirit is the one who does the work on the inside of us to give us more patience when our patience is running out. 

We are called to love our neighbors as ourselves (Mark 12:30). It is the love of God that bears witness to the unbeliever. Love goes beyond an emotion; love is a constant decision to show up every day. Many of us look to relationships to give us what only Jesus can. Love is actually choosing the greater good for the other person. Love means showing up with something to give, rather than looking for love to complete you. 

The Holy Spirit is what gives us the oil, the maturity and ability to have longevity in our relationships. To have authentic relationships we need vulnerability, not perfection. We have to allow Jesus to do the perfecting work that only he can do (Philippians 2:13-15). 

Often we get stuck in our own pain, but it’s important that we get healing from the right place. When we don’t get healing from Jesus, then we bleed all over everyone else. When we do get healing from Jesus, we can allow him to first address those wounds and do the work that only he can do. When we look to people to fill those pain points, we will be disappointed by their responses. We can choose to live by the grace of God every day and access the Holy Spirit to give us power to live from that place. Otherwise, we will live out of pain or from wrong labels that others have put on us, rather than living out of a place of victory.The Holy Spirit will help us to love others the way that God has loved us (John 15:12). 

We are to love others as we love ourselves. We love ourselves enough to be forgiven, to receive grace and mercy and to call out to the Lord. We tend to judge ourselves by our intentions, but we judge others by their actions. The Holy Spirit is always reminding us how much grace and forgiveness we have received from God. On our own, we will never be able to achieve the amount of love or grace we need for others without the Holy Spirit. 

Healthy relationships take work and time. When we invest in the right relationships, we will see the right return. Being right does not produce a good relationship. What produces longevity and good relationships is, “I’m sorry.” Pride and arrogance often shut us out from the work that God wants to do in our lives (Matthew 7:5). When we show grace and vulnerability, it allows intimacy to grow in our relationships. 

2. Sever harmful relationships. 

One of the greatest hindrances to healthy relationships is toxic and unhealthy relationships. The Bible says not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14). This is not from a place of believing that we are better than unbelievers. To understand this scripture, we have to understand the context in an agricultural society. When one ox was yoked to another, and one was stronger than the other and going too fast, it would cause the other to choke and die. We are not judging others, but rather we are recognizing that there are relationships where, if we stay in them or try to move forward with them in a particular way, then we are going to harm the other person or end up harming ourselves. 

3. Initiate 

When it comes to loving God and loving people, we have to be mindful of the fact that God has put people into our lives on purpose. Some of us in this season have not talked to people that we really care about. Sometimes we might be tempted to wait, but we need to initiate. Christianity is not about a “don’t” but about right living-- loving your spouse, children, and relatives like you have been loved by the Lord (James 4:7). We did not choose God, but he chose us. When we initiate, we are acting in the image of God. When it comes to godly, loving relationships, be quick to initiate. Initiate relationships, reconciliation, and acts of kindness. Initiate the process of what you know you should do, of what is right, and what God wants to do in your life. 

Reflection/Discussion Questions: 

1. What are the most important relationships in your life, and how are you investing in them? 

2. How can the Holy Spirit help you to love and care for those relationships well in this season? 

3. Are there any toxic or unhealthy relationships that you need to sever?

4. What can you do to initiate relationship, reconciliation, and acts of kindness this week?